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Creative Spiritual Women

How’s Your Ego?


“How are you doing?”

We are asked that question all day, every day.

We use it to connect, to break the ice, to greet each other and show that we care.

But what we’re really asking is, “How’s your ego?”

Our egos are what get upset about work. Our egos feel unhappy about the weather. Our egos wish our sports team would win. Our egos wish we made more money or felt thinner.

We connect over our egos. Our egos are valuable, and they have a purpose. Not only do we connect, but our ego keeps us alive in truly life-threatening situations.

But you are not your ego.

I know when I ask someone, “How are you?” that the person they really are, the thinker behind their thoughts, is perfect. We are all part of the Divine. As A Course in Miracles says,

Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists.

Fear and sadness can be “threatened” with peace and happiness.

The real you, the one who does the feeling and thinking? Can’t be threatened by waves of emotions.

Many of us go our whole lives without realizing this. Battered by our emotions, we ride them up and down, kicking and screaming, without connecting to the Real self within, who is as calm and peaceful, unmoved by our ego’s unrest.

So when you hear, “how are you?” smile, because You are perfect and whole.

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15 comments… add one
  • Love this! Has me totally thinking about my intention behind asking and answering “how are you?” Perfect and whole we are indeed!

    • Belle

      So true! Thank you so much for taking the time to comment Kandice. We’re making a difference!!

  • Hi Belle! I have been thinking a lot about the ego lately, too, because I finally read “A New Earth” by Eckhart Tolle. This morning while walking in the park I noticed that my ego was telling its familiar tale of woe and fear and shame. So I stepped back from the tale and into “I AM” where everything is peaceful and easy. It was a glorious morning! Thanks again for all your writings… love love shannon

    • Belle

      LOVE “A New Earth”! How funny, I’ve been listening to the audio version lately. The ego is fun to tame when we decide to let it be- and so freeing!

  • Such a gorgeous image and a great reminder.

    • Belle

      Thank you Kathryn!

  • i will remember with an internal smile when i am asked. :) thank you for the visit to my blog. come again when you are in the neighborhood.

    • Belle

      Likewise, Irene! Love it that we’re friends in the blogosphere <3

  • No, we are not our egos and yes, the one inside me who can look at my thoughts and emotions, pains and failures, joys and gifts and feel the peace is not only perfect, but eternal compassionate and free

  • Love this post, perfectly expressed.

  • So true how we can choose to connect to the Real Self within and choose peace and calmness in the midst of feeling like we are in chaos off kilter with our emotions. I loved this post. Well explained. Thanks. :)

  • Kat

    Beautifully said! And so very true.

  • Such wise words, and a great reminder!

  • i love this and i always say “great” when i’m asked how i am….even if i feel a bit down or impatient…..hoping that in doing so, the person who asked feels better just seeing the smile on my face :)

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